Top 10 Sex WTF!

1. Oral Sex is illegal in 18 states
   
2. In Virginia, it is illegal to have sex with the lights on
   
3. It is illegal for husbands in Willowdale, Oregon, to talk dirty during intercourse
   
4. Sexual intercourse between unmarried couples is illegal in Georgia
   
5. Engaging in any sexual position other than missionary is illegal in Washington, DC
   
6. In Connorsville, Wisconsin, it is illegal for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner is having an orgasm
   
7. In Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, it is illegal to have sex with a truck driver inside a toll booth
   
8. Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal in Florida
   
9. It is illegal in Utah to marry your first cousin before the age of 65
   
10. Sex with animals is perfectly legal for men in Washington state, as long as the animal weighs less than 40 pounds
    

serious?
nice. i like the 10th
ok... another phucked up law:

In L.A. every husband is allowed to hit his wife with a leather belt provided it is not wider than 2 inches. if it´s wider the wife have to permit explicitly before the strike.

it´s true, i think it´s a remnant from the wild west?

A guy walks into a whorehouse. He says to the madam "what can i get for $20?" She says "I'm sry we don't have an girls for that price." He says "well, i don't wanna phuck her i just want to eat her pussy" She says "ok, let me call around and see if there are any available." After a few calls a girl agrees. He heads up and she lying on the bed. He procides to go down on her .... ....all of a sudden there is a pea in his mouth. he spits if off to the side and continues to go down on her. just then he feels something in his mouth spits it in his hand and it's a piece of corn spits it off to the side he goes down one more time only yo find a piece of carrot in his mouth. Now he"s pissed he says " What the Phuck??!....Bitch you sick!??" She say says " No......But the last guy was!"

A woman is in a really bad car accident and is rushed to the hospital. The doctors do all that they can until finally one of the doctors comes out to talk to her husband who is waiting in the hall. The husband is in tears as he waits to find out the fate of his wife.
"I'm sorry sir, your wife is in a very critical condition." says the doctor. "She can't eat. She can't speak. Can't move. She nearly broke every bone in her body and there is severe nerve damage to her whole system. I'm afraid she's going to be confined to a wheelchair for the rest of her life. She's going to need someone to take care of her. To feed her. Watch her. To clean her. Basically to take care of her every need until the day she dies."
The husband puts his face in his hands and starts bawling. "Oh my God!"
Just then the doctor starts bursting with laughter and slaps the husband on the back. "Hahaha. I'm kidding, man. She's dead."


If that wasn't fucked up enough here's another:

Q: What's the best part about fucking forty-five-year-olds?

A: There's forty of them.

Haha. It's ok, she's dead!!!

Ok long time phucked reader/watcher/looker, first time forum signer-upper so......


Rich man and poor man are sitting in a bar around Christmas time, both sulking over their beers. Finally rich man says to the poor man, "Man I hate Christmas, I can never figure out what to get for my wife!" Poor man says, "I got the same problem. What'd you get for your wife?" Rich man quickly replies, "Brand new Mercedes Benz and a diamond ring." "Phuck me!!!" says the poor man. "Why'd you get her both of those??" Rich man snidely replies, "well it's a contingency plan. You see, if she doesn't like the diamond ring I bought her she can be happy returning it to the jewelery store in her Mercedes Benz." "Ohhhh, I see. I kinda did the same thing", says the poor man. "Oh yeah, what did get your wife?" replied the rich man. Poor man says, "Pair of slippers and a dildo." "Okay, I'll bite" says the poor man. "How is that ANYTHING like what I got my wife???" Poor man says, "well, if she doesn't like the slippers she can go phuck herself!"

Little Johnny is walking by his parents bedroom when he hears a lot of noise.
He opens the door and sees his dad with mom bent over the dresser having sex.
Dad looks at Little Johnny and smiles and winks. He motions for Johnny to leave the room so Little Johnny leaves.

A few minutes later dad is walking past Little Johnny's bedroom and hears a noise.
He opens the door to see Little Johnny with grandma bent over the dresser having sex.

Little Johnny looks at dad and smiles and winks.
He says to dad:
"It's not so funny when it's YOUR momma, is it?"

Message was deleted by a Moderator.

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