Kinks
Dirty talk.
I enjoy listening to it, but only two or three people out of the P (mathematical variable for "partners") I've slept with have managed to get me to reciprocate. I have a slight lisp due to the alignment of my upper teeth and a very deep voice, so unless you're into nerdy Asian women who sound like Daffy Duck on testosterone, I will never, ever get over the embarrassment of talking dirty in bed. Recently, there was a guy who dirty-talked so well, he got me to do it with him – he dirty-talked me in a way to tell me he was in control, that he "owned" me, but also letting me know that he was taking care of my needs too – and he definitely was. I mean, this is the same guy I almost punched in the face during sex while rolling on ecstasy because it felt so good. Am I kicking your ass during sex? Then you're doing a great job! With that, I've learned that not everyone can be good at saying nasty things in bed nor can they be good at saying romantic, loving and passionate things in bed. When I was 20, I dated a 38 year old Swiss guy who said to me, during sex, "You make love better than most women in their thirties." I was both flattered and really uncomfortable, so I concluded that I'm not one for the romancing type of dirty talk. Unfortunately, he was the same guy who used the word "pee pee" during sex and from that point forward, I made him speak to me in German whenever he had the need to verbally express himself during sex. And thufferin' thuckatash, it worked out for the best!
On the subject of foreign languages… that's my number one preference when it comes to dirty talk. One of my "pre-screening" questions is whether a man is fluent in another language and if he is fluent, which language? You can only imagine how many bonus points he wins when it's a language I like. My favorites thus far are Hebrew and German; auxiliary favorites include Russian, Swedish, Lithuanian, and Italian – basically Germanic, Scandinavian, and Semitic, or anything remotely guttural and aggressive in sound. Overall, if I can't understand you, then there's no possible way you can sound like an idiot during sex.
Facials.
Self-explanatory – I'm a self-proclaimed receptacle, something I'll admit to very, very few people. It doesn't necessarily have to be on the face, in fact, I prefer it to be there and everywhere else. I love a white mess.
Hair pulling.
I love having my hair pulled, but not enough that you're going to walk away with a potential wig. Reach for it, pull gently, just above the scalp – gentle enough so that you're not hurting me, but aggressive enough to show me who's in control. If you do it well enough, then I'm butter in your hands – no pun intended. On occasion, I'll probably pull on my partner's hair too, but just enough to show him that I'm into whatever he's doing. One of the signs you should look out for if you're sleeping with me. Does this seem boring too? Add some flavor by combining facials with hair pulling. Not sure what I'm getting at? Grab me by the hair, pull my head back, and shoot a big one on my face. Moving on…
Anal.
Best done while verbally degrading me. I admire a man who has the audacity to call me a dirty little whore when he's got his cock in my ass. Kudos!
Scratching.
Again, self-explanatory – as much as I enjoy being scratched (LOVE it, actually), I'm usually more of the scratcher than the scratchee. It's a shame.
Biting.
There goes that kooky oral fixation again. I love being bitten, especially on the neck and shoulders – and if I'm really into it, I kind of like having my skin broken. On occasion, I'll bite my partner as well if he's into it.
Toys and other inanimate objects.
This applies to both anal and vaginal penetration. You name it, I've probably had sex with it. If I haven't, I'm more than willing to try. If the object has been in my ass, then it's a no-brainer that it has been in my vagina as well. Vibrators and dildos of various sizes, anal beads, cucumbers, bananas, toothbrushes, Coke bottles (that one was kind of tough), government-issued batons, blah, blah, blah, etc.
Piercings.
Another contradiction of mine. I'm totally attracted to the clean cut, white collar types. I think tattoos are a total turn-off (unless they're concealed) and I don't care much for piercings... or rather, I didn't until I had sex with someone who had a pierced cock. I tell you, it was the most erotic thing that ever entered my mouth. Hooray for stepladder penis!
Group sex.
Threesomes are great! I'm not going to lie. I'm not so much of a voyeur as I am an exhibitionist and a female cuckold. I do find some excitement in watching other people have sex, but find more excitement in it when my partner and I are being watched or when I'm watching my significant other have sex with another woman. It's a total turn-on watching him fuck someone else! You probably think I'm seriously fucking weird. When my ex-fiancé and I had a threesome with a girl we were not particularly attracted to, watching him have sex and fooling around with her was still really, really intense for me. I loved him so much, I just felt the need to share him with someone else. When I'm completely single and not dating anyone, my favorite kind of group sex is with older, married couples. I'm not sure why.
